Revew: V "Mother's Day"

"Would you say that's lavender? What do you think? Lavender? No?"

Non Spoiler Review!

What could be the final episode of V promised a cast cull and plenty of excitement. What we got was more of a checklist of items unfolding in the usual manner to push along the plot. That being said, the second half moved things along more briskly than the first. The two queens plotline is wrapped up, we get some deaths, though all of them happen in such an offhand manner there isn't really a sense of loss. We see the Visitors without their skin, and lots of Blissing and serpentine tails being lashed about (that appear to be extremely stretchy). As usual, multiple characters act foolishly and create disaster for everyone. The only saving grace was the guilty pleasure of watching Anna (literally) chew up the scenes with her over-the-top villainy.

V returns to the religious themes it loves to dance around, and perhaps that might have worked had it not been the end of the series. Something on this scale should have been at the forefront of the invasion rather than a spontaneous idea to try to Bliss humans as Anna decided last week.

The big reveal at the end lacked any punch, highlighting the writing flaws that focus more on standalone episodes than a serialized arc that promises build up and foreshadowing. A sad way to go out, if that's the case, given the string of failures the Fifth Column has already endured since Erica took over. If there is a season three, it will certainly be a changed dynamic. But the plotlines seem in such a mess I wonder if it's even worth it.

Never fails when you wear a white dress—impaled on spiky reptile tail.

Spoilers Now:

Erica wakes up in bed with Anna sitting there, and a gun on her. No one but her knows what it's like to have the fate of an entire species on her shoulders, Anna muses. "I'm nothing like you!" Erica protests. Anna shoots her. And Erica wakes up from her of course it's a dream. But she is sleeping with Hobbes again. It's going to be a big day, because today is when they take down Anna.

Lisa is fertile and ready to mate with Tyler. That's sufficient for some Anna gloating. But they haven't found the secret of the human soul yet, negative Marcus counters. Amy is the answer, she tells him. She'll help them Bliss humans. Marcus remains skeptical, but a terse I'm the queen! from Anna shuts him up. Then Amy runs in. She's had a dream something bad happened to her mommy, but Anna promises to never abandon her like her father. Lisa walks in on them hugging. 

Diana has contacted the resistance with an urgent message. Marcus informed her Anna's plans are moving along and they can't wait any longer for their coup. Erica's less of a fascist these days, so she asks for everyone's vote, but everyone agrees anyway. She orders Ryan to redeem himself and break Diana out. 

Lisa shows up in a coffin for some reason and has brought some V weaponry to Hobbes. But she didn't get Tyler off the ship and wants to know the plan. Erica needs to get Anna away from her security, so they'll fake Lisa's kidnapping. Oh, and by the way, Lisa will be the one to kill her.

Chad breaks the news that Lisa has been kidnapped, saying the Fifth Column has unprecedented demands—Anna's life in exchange for Lisa's. Anna watches on Vcam, sending her best tracker and readying her shuttle. 

Anna arrives at the embassy and meets with Paul and Erica who are acting FBI again. They've been instructed to bring her to Jack, and if she agrees to the trade, they'll take her to her daughter. Paul has a body double ready, but Anna says she must meet their demands. 

Anna opts to meet with Jack. She can't help but remind him his anti-V rhetoric has cost him his collar. God is telling him to do the Fifth Column's bidding? He doesn't answer to her, he counters. He was told she was to turn herself over in one hour with instructions in an envelope, at which point he'll be informed where they're holding Lisa. She also wants to someday meet his god, she whispers. 

She gives the envelope to her tracker who sniffs it and heads off to locate the human scent. He does this rather quickly, advising that Lisa's alone in a warehouse. The Fifth Column must have left already. Anna addresses the crowd gathered around the embassy. If anything happens to her she hopes the world with accept her daughter as they have her. Then she directs her agents to ensure Chad Decker is there when the FBI gets her daughter.

Hobbes is still with Lisa, though (tracker must have missed that) and then leaves after getting her ready for her mission. The gun is behind her in a desk. The FBI got an anonymous tip that Lisa was inside and arrives at the warehouse with Chad and crowds of people. Anna wants to adhere strictly to the Fifth Column's demands so she won't use a body double. Marcus advises her it's safe for her to go in.

Anna finds Lisa and unties her, then begins to rage about the Fifth Column. But she sees her daughter's reflection and watches her reach behind her to get a V gun. Anna starts going on about how worried she was, and realizes her human skin has made her feel emotions she felt when she might lose her. She turns around as Lisa hides the gun behind her, and walks over. Everything will change—there will be peace between humans and Visitors. Lisa sucks it up and embraces her as Anna confesses her love for her daughter. She slips the gun back in the desk.

Lisa comes out first, then Anna, leaving a horrified Erica and Chad. Anna goes to get interviewed by him, leaving Erica and Lisa to talk. Lisa says her mother's changed, but Erica is incensed that the entire plan is blown open. Lisa says they can trust her. She's merciless, Erica says. But no more merciless than you can be, Lisa snaps back.

Ryan gets on the mothership via shuttle, meeting with Joshua, who takes him to Diana's cell. They get Diana, who is sporting a funky white dress now. They contact Erica who informs her Lisa failed and they have to abort. But Diana won't go back to her cell and instructs Joshua and Ryan to gather her people.

It doesn't take long to assemble thousands of Vs on the mothership apparently, as Diana walks out among her people, her children. She explains Anna had her imprisoned and is ill-equipped to be their queen. The human soul must be embraced. Together they can live side by side. Her people kneel around her. Then Anna suddenly appears (no one saw her, Marcus and Lisa walk across the stage) and impales her with her tail and hoists her up above the crowd, throwing her down. Diana tells her with her dying breath that she's doomed her species.

That's how you kill your mother, Anna tells Lisa. Snap! Anna explains to the crowd (who isn't startled at all given they have no emotion) that Diana was imprisoned because she was stained with human emotion and would have subverted their species. If anyone defies her will they'll meet the same fate as her mother. Then she orders Lisa taken away, and, oh yes, everyone kneel. Joshua and Ryan are watching in the crowd, and Ryan says he's not leaving without Amy, so he scurries off.

Amy's in her funky bedroom when Ryan shows up. She's not happy to see him at all, and he tries to explain they have to leave before Anna finds out. But she won't go with him, and her lizard tail appears. He abandoned her and let her suffer, she says, and she'll never let him hurt her again. She strangles him with her tail and just like that breaks his neck. 

Erica calls Tyler and tells him to get off the ship now. She's kept things about the Vs and it's time he learned the truth. But Tyler wants to hear all that from Lisa herself, and tells her he loves her and hangs up. Meanwhile, Paul and Chris are listening to the whole thing, as they have Erica's house bugged. 

Chad reports world leaders are flocking to Anna after her selfless decision. Anna is pleased. And she finally brings Marcus into the loop that Lisa won't be mothering the species. She takes Marcus to Joshua, who is watching the queen egg hatch, and there's the first full frontal Visitor in the flesh. Anna tells them to put skin on her new daughter and ensure she looks exactly like Lisa. Tyler's in for a surprise!

Jack and Chad meet up with Erica. Hobbes has vanished and everything has been cleared out of their headquarters. No one can get a hold of him or Ryan. Erica's a bit upset with everything that's going on and Tyler still being on the ship and all. Bad day overall. She decides Jack is the only one who stuck to his beliefs while she became someone just like Anna. So they're friends again.

Marcus confesses to Anna that he watched her fall prey to emotion and betrayed her to her mother, so he offers up his death as punishment. She says no, given he acted on what he believed was best for their species. But she has learned emotion can be useful—it's how she stopped Lisa from killing her by preying on her vulnerability. Using it to manipulate humans will make her more powerful than ever. Grrr.

He's sad he can't give up any of the conspirators, given he only dealt with Lisa and Diana, but she pulls up the Fifth Column hostage video on Vcam and uses human technology (?) to unscramble the voices of the kidnappers. Uh oh. It's Chad. She tells Marcus to bring him to her (and don't betray her again, by the way, or she won't go so easy on him!). Joshua brings Lisa 2.0 in and she's just perfect. In fact she's apparently a completely functional mental adult, as well, so Anna sends her off to Tyler.

Lisa's waiting in bed as Tyler arrives and needs to talk. He says he heard that they don't really look like humans underneath and they're there to hurt everyone. That's just crazy, Lisa says. And seduces him.

Lisa 1.0 is being held in grandma's old home, and Anna welcomes her there. Anna won't kill her, because she wants her to suffer, and turns on the Vcam to watch her new sister having sex with Tyler. After they're done, Lisa opens her fangy mouth and kills him. Other Lisa screams.

Erica's still trying to reach Tyler but instead gets abducted from her home. She's tied up in a dark room and a shadowy figure emerges who is none other than Mike Donovan himself (!)—except he's named Lars. She's there because of what she knows and must now deal with the consequences. 

She's brought into a ginormous war room a mile beneath Manhattan that Lars suspiciously says can withstand a nuclear bomb or the destruction of a mothership (!)—obviously a graduate of the same school as Erica when it comes to planning Fifth Column operations. Poor Manhattan. This is Project Ares, a cabal of high ranking military and government leaders that long suspected the Vs were not of peace and have been on Earth a long time. And there's Chris and Paul! They've been tracking her long enough to know she can be trusted. This is humanity's last best hope.

Meanwhile a team of V heavies show up at the network and tell Chad he's to come with them to see Anna. It's not really a choice, either. Bye Chad.

Anna is dressed all in white and attempting to Bliss humanity, but Marcus thinks it will surely kill her. As her eyes bleed, Marcus tries to stop her. Then Amy arrives and tells her she can do it for her. So Amy takes over.

Alarms go off in the war room. The computers are detecting something is happening to people... everywhere, as around the world they dreamily stare up at the motherships as Amy's Bliss seduces them. Anna praises her as a miracle.

Erica gets up to the surface (maybe not the best idea if she was in a secure location and safe) and sees everyone in a trance as far as the eye can see. Oh, and there's Jack, too, and it looks like his faith has been turned to something else now. The camera pulls back from the mothership and out into orbit where the masses of Visitor ships lie in wait.

WTF?!

Devotion to the Visitors is finally manifested on a worldwide scale. But there appears to be little room for maneuvering if it comes back next season—does everyone just wake up from the V's rapture and move on?

Is V actually commenting that faith can be swayed so easily? That's a bold statement, which falls short given it's had so little play on the series. If this had been an ongoing theme that the masses could be moved at Anna's whims, the final moments would have proved a culmination to that agenda, rather than just another plan of the week.

If this is the end of the series, the finale is quite a dark one, with the defeat of humanity and Anna victorious. Given the Fifth Column never really struck any lasting victories under Erica, it serves as a monument to her failure, despite the reveal of the Ares Project.

After all the incriminating talk in her house over how many weeks, it takes the Ares Project until this moment to determine she can be trusted to be part of their cabal (yes, they call themselves a cabal). She was sleeping with Hobbes there, for Pete's sake.

It was really unclear just where Marcus' loyalties lay through the whole episode. He was giving everyone, including Erica, suspicious stares, and even filled in Diana about the situation, yet is suddenly loyal to Anna again. What was the ultimate purpose of taking him out of commission anyway, leaving Thomas with nothing to do now.

The soap operish moments provided the most entertainment, including the fully grown, fully functional Lisa 2.0 who is apparently an adult mentally, as well as physically. Anna's delight in her grandiose revenge schemes against her mother and daughter brought some chuckles, showing she's likely the most emotional of all the Visitors.

What exactly constitutes loyalty to one's queen? Anna kills the mother of a lot of the Visitors right in front of them, yet they do nothing at all. That means Anna's rule was never in question from the start if she could take over with a few angry words without any worry of repercussions from Diana's subjects.

As much as I hated Tyler and Ryan, their deaths were so casually brushed off, it just felt like the writers were checking off an itinerary for the episode. I am a bit surprised Lisa 1.0 survived (especially given how her choice pretty much doomed everyone), but they do need a queen in waiting to write themselves out of a bind if necessary.

I feel like ranting about all the wasted storylines that went nowhere—Karen and Thomas? Tyler's on and off phosphorous levels? Hobbes' absent dead-alive girlfriend? There seemed to be no desire to create a cohesive arc. While the advancement of the plot did benefit from this shortened season, the series has never really escaped its problematic beginnings—attempting to expand a series out of what was a successful miniseries, but never allowing it to evolve beyond its initial scope.

It would be nice to see V renewed just to imagine the crazy of a season three full scale war. A series like this needed a more adult venue on cable like AMC or HBO. I'm holding out hope that the forthcoming Falling Skies will pick up the many balls V dropped delivering a decent alien invasion.

Review: V "Devil In a Blue Dress"

Non Spoiler Review:

In what could be the penultimate V episode, we realize that Anna isn't the only queen of hair-brained schemes—Erica is following a close second. After the launch of a blue energy reactor in New York for the Concordia construction, the Fifth Column decides to create a Three Mile Island event to turn the public against this latest gift from the Visitors. 

Anna finds many uses for her Bliss, and Marcus is back on his feet sending harsh glares at anyone in his path and spending the whole episode trying to catch Anna being emotional. There was a lot of set up and moving pieces into place for the finale, and some crazy camera work, too, which seemed very out of place. But this week dropped the ball on the previous two stronger episodes, if only for Erica's inane terrorist scheme and throwing out any idea that science matters with the blue energy situation. With no Anna/Diana interaction, we didn't even get a cathartic bitchy conclusion to round out the episode. Big fail.

Spoilers Now!

Anna kicks off the construction of Concordia sites by activating the first blue energy reactor. But out of earshot, she and Thomas muse that soon their breeding sites will be complete and the annihilation of humanity can begin—just in case he's forgotten. They must really enjoy this state-the-obvious banter. Too bad she lacks emotion, because all that's missing is maniacal laughter.

Erica's there watching, and has a run in with Tyler, so she takes the opportunity to pass off his father's jacket to him and Tyler gets all wishy-washy and apologizes for being such a bad son. She invites him to dinner. It looks like things are back on track. But Anna shoots them both the stink eye seeing him get all emotional with his mom. 

Diana gets a visit from Marcus (who they forgot to tell us is all better now). He's shocked to learn Anna did this to their queen, but takes Anna's side at the suggestion she's succumbed to emotion. Diana explains that fifteen years before, when she chose to abandon their mission, it was Anna who overthrew her out of pride. Marcus says he's loyal to his species, and must report to Anna about this. "I'm the queen," Diana announces, and Anna will doom them if she continues like this.

Sydney summons a meeting and he's built an awesome model of the Concordia site, because he's noticed the reactor is too big. Based on his projections (from using the power cell in a device he found in Malik's safe) he projects the Concordia sites are going to produce enough power for a mothership. Then Sydney produces a big model of a mothership and sets it on top, and—gasp(!)—they all conclude Concordia is a landing site for their invasion. Sydney is an absolute genius (and pretty handy with scale models).

There are 538 Concordia sites but only 29 motherships...or are there? That means many more ships are coming. Erica realizes they just have to step up their game and suggests they do a Three Mile Island—sabotage the New York blue energy reactor so it scares people. Hey, that just might work, given it's Manhattan and nothing ever remotely terrorist-like has ever happened there that might turn people against the Fifth Column.

So Erica Bin Laden will get Lisa to supply blue energy samples for Sydney to research (because he's a physicist this week), while Fierro will handle all the logistics for getting them onto the construction site and into the reactor. All sounds simple enough.

Marcus is back at work, and his first order of business is helping Anna deal with Tyler's sudden burst of emotion. Amy is the key—the Visitor in her accepts her Bliss, but the human side does not reject it. She orders testing to begin immediately, as Marcus coldly watches her for any sign of emotion.

Erica and Hobbes discuss the previous night, and she brushes it off as needing a break and can't lose focus. Ouch. Lisa shows up for their rendezvous and gives her some blue energy balls that she needs to return after they analyze it. They fill Lisa in on the plan and ask her to find out anything else she can about Concordia. But Ryan is watching them all from above.

As it turns out, when Ryan gave Valerie all that phosphorous it made Amy a super hybrid, with perhaps some yet to be determined powers, in addition to being Blissable.

Anna wonders if it's possible to Bliss the humans after all, because that would solve sooo many problems, but Marcus is against it, given Diana tried and failed. If Anna can control them through Bliss she can stop all resistance, so she tries on a prisoner, and after a painful ordeal (for both)—complete with blood gushing from Anna's eyes and some shaky cam—the girl appears to be at peace. Anna tests it out by telling her to kill herself with a suicide pill (she keeps an extra one handy in her lapel), and she does. Anna is ecstatic—almost emotional. If she can Bliss large numbers of humans everything will be so awesome, but Marcus thinks it will kill her.

Sydney analyzes the blue energy and offers this explanation—it's basically a particle/anti-particle idea and kind of like sticking a fork in a light socket. So apparently they can bring it down pretty easily. But...

Lisa's gone to Diana again to demand to know what her mother's plan is. Her grandmother attempts to brush her off, but Lisa tells her she's just like Anna, always keeping secrets, and she suggests Concordia is a landing site for the invasion because her friends figured it out already, so there. They're planning on sabotaging the reactor. This alarms Diana, because there are two sides to blue energy—the peaceful, power producing kind. And the other—the weaponized kind. If they've somehow weaponized it, it will destroy a hundred square miles (but at least that would turn people off blue energy).

The Fifth Column is already at Concordia ready to send in Sydney as a worker with a completely elaborate and implausible plan to get through security (because tonight, Visitor security sucks). Lisa contacts Ryan, who just happens to be there spying on them, and fills him in. She can't get a hold of Erica (can't find her cell phone, I guess) so he has to stop them.

Sydney is allowed into the site disguised as one of the construction workers. He's intercepted by one of the Fifth Column and let inside the building. He runs down a lot of stairs to get to the blue energy chamber (again with crazy camera work), while Ryan runs through a lot of culverts trying to get there, too. But Sydney gets into the big empty room of the reactor first, and tosses in the tiny balls, which get swallowed up.

Hobbes spots Ryan sneaking into the site, so he, Jack and Erica try to head him off. But Ryan gets into the reactor and tells Sydney to stop or it will cause a huge explosion. Sydney's all...I'm not gonna! Ryan asks if he's absolutely sure he didn't weaponize that, and he makes a run for the device, but is too late. The energy starts to go wild as Erica, Jack and Hobbes come in (how they managed to get through the workers outside is not important). Hobbes is ready to shoot Ryan on the spot, but he says Lisa sent him there to warn them. 

No one else on the site appears to be alerted by the alarm, oddly enough. Erica tells him to shut it down, but the energy has to vent. The reactor spits out the two balls. So...we don't really know what happened.

Anna is looking a little under the weather as Thomas and Marcus advise her that power has gone out over the city, and the only way it could have happened was if blue energy were used to sabotage the reactor. She suggests they use the reactor to restore power as a show of their benevolence. But the sabotage means the blue energy must have come from one of their ships.

Erica's not impressed that blue energy has saved the day and has only encouraged world governments to speed up construction of their reactors. Jack decides it's time to pitch another fit and argues with her about taking crazy risks. This time I have to agree. And even Hobbes takes his side, and suggests Eli chose Erica because she cared about innocents, not because she's an uber-fascist terrorist. She continues to act pissy and tells him just to follow orders. 

Anna summons Chad to tell him she's not pleased with Karen's anti-Visitor rhetoric. It would be unfortunate if she were to get in the way of Concordia. Back at the studio, he tells Karen she might be right. The blue energy might have caused the blackout in the first place. He says he can't report it because Anna would destroy his career, but she could break the story. So on air she makes the announcement that there was a near catastrophic failure at the Concordia site. But Chad's set her up with false information, so she gets fired. Karen throws a fit, but he says he's a one man show.

Joshua spies on Lisa as she enters a restricted area, but suddenly gets a flash of his memories helping Erica destroy the eggs. He runs in after Lisa as Thomas and his men are coming down the hall. He warns her to come with him quickly and they get away. Hey, I remember! he says. I'm Fifth Column, like you!

Tyler comes to see Anna to thank her for everything she's done, but he realizes he's been lashing out at his mother and now just wants to spend more time with her. She agrees, but first she'd like to give him something to help with his pain—her Bliss. Tyler has a blank look on his face as Lisa walks in and sees her mother's eyes bleeding. But Tyler is successfully Blissed.

Lisa reports to her grandmother. If Anna can Bliss humans, they have no chance, so she tells her to contact her human friends to help them end Anna's reign. So Lisa shows up for dinner with Erica rather than Tyler, letting her know about Anna's Bliss. Erica's feeling defeated, but Lisa says there's a plan if they're willing to take a risk.

Joshua comes to see Anna in the incubation chamber where the egg is nearly reaching maturity. But Lisa has shown no sign of failing her, he says. Maybe, Anna replies, but if she fails, the queen egg will save them.

Sydney has a camera calibrated to recognize blue energy like an infrared detector, and he, Jack and Hobbes train it on the New York mothership, which glows like a blue beacon. But when they focus on the open sky, they see it's filled with blue dots, other motherships that are already here and cloaked.

After a long day of Blissing, Anna chills on the coach, when Amy (who's looking older everyday) comes in to say hi and help her feel better. She loves her, she says...Mommy. And Anna gives her a big hug, while Marcus watches from the doorway. 

Erica brings Ryan and Lisa to headquarters. She's decided to take risks, and Ryan did save their lives even though she doesn't forgive him. But they need him. There are no options left, so Lisa shows a hologram of Diana, her grandmother, who greets them all. They are going to overthrow Anna.

WTF?!

I'm just going to ignore the blue energy insanity this week, and focus on Erica's stupid plan to create a meltdown at the reactor. She suggests they create a scare like Three Mile Island, by doing this with blue energy, which they know nothing about. What could possibly go wrong with that? This makes the 29 dead civilians last week pale in comparison.

The writers continue to have little foresight on what they're throwing out there. The Visitors have all the genetic material they need. Concordia is under construction. And the entire invasion fleet is orbiting the Earth already (a reveal at the end that lost a lot of its punch). Anna has managed to coordinate world governments to build 500 plus mini cities around the world. Why would public opinion matter about blue energy in the grand scheme of things? 

The pacing was completely off. The entire reactor operation seemed thrown together, including the odd camera work for several scenes. With the amount of set up necessary for next week's finale, plot points and explanations seemed to be glossed over even more rapidly than usual in order to get stuff out of the way.

Of course, there are the usual inconsistencies—Anna took great pains explaining away the deaths of a few live aboards last week, but she has no problem killing them willy-nilly this time. What exactly was the purpose of Chad's frame for Karen? My initial impression he was protecting her by getting her fired, but now I'm not so sure and it came across very self-serving. So much for redeeming that character.

I'm wondering if Diana will actually succeed in overthrowing Anna, which would make an interesting dynamic (if the series continues). It wouldn't be out of the ordinary for the writers to reveal Diana is even worse than her daughter. Plus we have the added hint that Amy could have a host of abilities we haven't seen yet. From all indications, there will be a big cast cull in the finale. Where to begin on my wish list?

Review: V "Uneasy Lies The Head"

Non Spoiler Review:

Uneasy Lies the Head forces both Lisa and Erica to face the weight of their new responsibilities in the grand scheme of things. A more focused and ends-justify-the-means Erica sets in motion a bold operation to destroy Anna's master plan, but at the expense of a close friendship. Anna is forced to accelerate the live aboard program when it becomes apparent all is not well with Lisa's 29 future ex-husbands. And the queen-in-waiting begins plotting against her mother with dear old grandma.

This was another decent episode that managed to rise above the outrageous science (again), ridiculous dialogue and plot devices to deliver some mature themes that we haven't seen on V before. Erica's character has swung to the other end of the spectrum, but it's a shot in the arm the show really needs at this point. She (and Hobbes) realize a war to save billions will require some sacrifice, and the singular way she goes about achieving this week's plan was shocking to watch, given how wishy-washy she and Jack have been. Whether it's realistic that losing her family would turn her into a global resistance leader is up for debate, but I like it.

Enter Ryan, who also played a significant role this week and, amazingly, was less annoying. All the pieces for the Fifth Column aboard the mothership are beginning to come together, including a surprise reveal at the end, while Diana's ongoing role and back story get more interesting. If the final episodes continue to deliver this new and improved V, I'll actually be looking for a third season.

And V officially has it's first sex scene (with humans).

Spoilers Now!

In Beijing, a peace ambassador collapses, bleeding from his eyes and vomiting some kind of pink nasty as onlookers scream. On the mothership, Anna's scientists (painfully) extract DNA from a live aboard (why not use one needle instead of 100?), adding it to a gigantic spinning machine that is combining all the best DNA they've gathered since the program began. Anna gloats (again) about decapitating the Fifth Column, and soon they will have the last genetic components they need to start breeding.

Or maybe not. Erica addresses the global Fifth Column, planning a strike against Anna. Sydney will infect the last live aboards with a flu virus that will contaminate their DNA (really), and once those components are mixed in with the rest, it will spread through the Visitor's stored samples and destroy them all—a DNA bomb. It doesn't sound all that nice for the live aboards, either.

But Erica and crew will need to break into a low security lab and steal the virus first. This time Sydney must come along to chose the correct sample, which prompts Jack to turn all pacifist again and insist Sydney isn't ready to be thrown into a combat situation. New and improved Erica tells him everyone is in the fight. End of story. Jack pouts.

Joshua reports that the Beijing boy was one of the 29 breeding candidates. One in Johannesburg already (conveniently) died on the mothership, so he can do an autopsy. What he finds is that the missing segments in their genetic structures are causing them to collapse (much like how the scientific accuracy on the show has). Until they acquire the last DNA of the live aboards, they could lose all the breeding boys. Anna steps up her agenda. So far Raphael remains the most suitable candidate until Tyler's viability can be determined. On to the good news—the queen egg is nearing maturity thanks to Joshua.

Anna forces Lisa to make a second date with Raphael with instructions not to mess it up again. Thomas advises her one of the live aboards' children, Jennifer, has a uniquely high immune system which would be totally awesome to add to their genetic makeup. But her mother, Melissa (a live aboard candidate), is being uncooperative and insists on meeting Anna before she agrees to come aboard.

Anna turns on the charm and meets Melissa and little Jennifer. Melissa has concerns, because if she came up to the ship she would have to leave Jennifer, as her daughter wouldn't have any friends to play with. Anna confesses that she has a daughter of her own, Amy, that she's kept secret for security reasons. And she's precisely Jennifer's age. Neat!

Ryan is enjoying some time with his daughter Amy that is rudely interrupted by an assassin. Amy somehow runs out during this. Ryan makes short work of him, though, and runs over to see Joshua (because security measures on the mothership are non-existent). With a  gun to him, he demands to know where his daughter is, but Joshua says she's with Anna and needs her Bliss. He can't cure her, by the way. Ryan says they were comrades once in the Fifth Column, since he's all about human emotions again, and he hopes Joshua can rediscover the emotion inside him. Then he knocks him out using the emotion of blunt objects to the head.

Using science, to build things...with technology!

Erica and Hobbes lead the team on a frontal assault on the science facility, getting to the lab (pretty easily). Sydney finds their virus, but a guard walks in and shoots Hobbes. Erica shoots him back, and Jack runs over to fret over the fallen guard until he notices that he's wearing a vest. They all make a clean getaway, and Jack's upset because this war has way too much shooting.

Raphael shows up to see Lisa again for their second try. He's a young Ricardo Montalban. She was just nervous the first time, she explains, and kisses him. Except Tyler happens to walk in, which really spoils the mood. Plus, his short haircut has made him all belligerent and he starts punching Raphael. That causes Raphael's eyes to bleed and vomit up pink stuff and kills the entire mood for Lisa.

The next day, the virus is being distributed and Erica's team is responsible for infecting their candidate in New York. Sydney advises that as long as no one interferes with the infected (whatever that means), there likely wont be any side effects (like death). Jack is horrified that he wasn't told this was a possibility, but Erica tells him she knew he wouldn't agree anyway and it has to be done. When he balks she asks what he did in the army when a superior officer gave him an order he didn't like. He followed it, of course. Well, consider it an order. Haha, Jack! So Erica, Hobbes and Sydney spike some coffee and pass it off to the live aboard. The rest of the Fifth Column is successful with their targets around the world.

Tyler comes to see Lisa in the lab, who is looking at sickly Raphael. Tyler apologizes, but Lisa tells him there are things going on bigger than both. He seems to have found his emotions he lost last week, and leaves like a hurt puppy. Maybe he shouldn't have told her all he cared about was being a shuttle pilot.

Melissa arrives on board with little Jennifer anxious to meet Amy. Anna wants Joshua to begin the DNA extraction on the girl immediately. Meanwhile, the infected guy starts to feel sick in the registration line, and manages to pass out right there. Joshua sedates him immediately to determine the cause and finds a virus has been introduced into his system contaminating his DNA. If it had gotten into their batch, it would have been disastrous.

Anna orders all the live aboards to be tested immediately around the world, and any infected are to be executed. For some reason the only way to explain that to the public is to say they were Fifth Column, effectively announcing that it's still active around the world. 

Ryan sneaks up on Lisa, telling her he's on Erica's side. She tells him there is someone on the ship who can help him, and they go see Diana. His queen! Ryan's in shock. She remembers him, as she does all her children. Ryan needs to escape the ship and Diana will help, but expects a favor in the future. Years ago she built secret escape pods cloaked from detection by humans and Visitors. No one knows about them (This is actually quite believable given that every room in the mothership appears to have 10 metre high cathedral ceilings. So hiding a dozen launch tubes and shuttlecraft in the superstructure likely wasn't a big deal back in the day).

But Ryan wants to see his daughter one last time. His hybrid daughter. What what what?! says Diana. A successful hybrid? That could mean the future of their species. Any enemy of her daughter is a friend of hers, and not to worry, she can use her own Bliss to cure her. 

Chad goes on air, announcing another Fifth Column attack on the motherships. According to the official story suicide bombers gained access as part of the live aboards and blew themselves up. They've identified the New York perpetrator as the same guy Erica infected.

Erica finds some minor victory in at least resurrecting the Fifth Column in the minds of everyone, despite that the DNA attack was a failure. But Jack sees no victory at all, just 29 innocents dead. She has a private conversation with him and Jack needs to acknowledge the deaths. Erica tells him it's a war with billions at stake. But he refuses to believe that she's changed so completely that she's brushing it off so easily.

Ryan is back to wandering around the mothership, and, with Lisa's help, gets a last look at his daughter as he uses a device to spy on Lisa, her mother, and Amy. He vows to come back to her, then activates one of the escape pods, which miraculously appears out of the ceiling and ferries him off the ship. 

Little Jennifer is in the process of having her DNA extracted and Joshua adds it to the mix, completing the cataloging sequence. Anna wants all the boys injected immediately. Anna summons Tyler, telling him he needs to prepare his body for interstellar travel. Joshua gives him an injection (much less painful than the extraction process, evidently). Tyler gets his dose of super DNA and Anna promises she'll never hurt him. The concerted attack of the Fifth Column is alarming, however, and she needs to identify the new leader.

Back at home, Erica looks at the photo of their victim and calls Jack. But he won't answer. Then Hobbes shows up figuring she could use a friendly face and she quickly forgets about Jack. He's brought a bottle. He tells her she did bloody good today. He turns to leave but she asks him to come in. They start doing shots and she admits she's not sure how she's doing given Tyler's absence and Joe's death. He says he lost someone he cared about once (oh, and nearly betrayed the Fifth Column a couple of weeks back), and vows they'll get her kid back. Then they make out. And have sex.

Lisa advises her grandmother Ryan escaped. Diana is pleased she brought him to her. They are all feeling emotion, including Anna, who just won't admit it. But they need to reach out for help. There's someone else aboard Diana trusts who needs to know she's there. So Lisa goes to sickbay and tells a vastly recovered Marcus that Diana is alive. 

WTF?!

This week delivered on the consequences of the Fifth Column's plan going awry. It brings to mind last season's episode where the resistance shot down a shuttle only to find human remains. Ultimately they were off the hook when it turned out to be a Visitor frame. But here it was surprising to see that 29 innocents died as a result of Erica's plan. Good job.

My way or the highway Erica is coming a bit out of left field, but it's certainly shaking things up, and the chemistry with Hobbes is welcome. It only occurred to me watching their tryst that this is the first real sex scene on the show. The series needs some romance. It's a good pairing, though, and reminiscent of the original series hookup between resistance leaders Julie and Donovan.

I confess to enjoying spineless Jack's doe-eyed reactions. His character bumbles along with no real direction—one minute making YouTube videos without regard to the consequences, then getting upset when the resistance actually starts fighting.

The idea of loyalty to different queens is an interesting element raised this week, with Diana's progeny (and her own Bliss) as potential forces to raise against her daughter. Is Anna's position resting entirely on the secrecy of her coup against her mother? 

So Uneasy Lies the Head managed to rise above the usual insane science and plot devices, though I'm wondering if some of that quality can be attributed to Amy's growth spurt that gave us the first week without a screaming baby. 

Review: V "Birth Pangs"

Non Spoiler Review:

A week later, Tyler is staying aboard the mothership living out a mundane fantasy version of alien Top Gun, but trouble brews when Anna learns his phosphorous levels (and personality, charm, charisma, etc...) are much lower than anticipated, despite Red Rain, meaning her alternate plan needs to kick in if he doesn't work out. As newly anointed head of the Fifth Column, Erica must prove her worth with Eli's lieutenants, requiring a trip to Bangkok that ultimately results in a massive infodump about the Visitor breeding program.

While we get the usual marathon plot antics to push forward the necessary information this week, it's unusually gratifying (gasp!) when we learn the truth behind the Visitors. It's actually a decent twist on the alien invasion that sets this series apart from its predecessor's "We need your food and water" trope.

Characters continues to flounder, though, and I won't even start about Tyler. Erica has found a lot of backbone since last week, so much so that Hobbes looks like a puppy dog around her. Anna had a helluva lot of walking around the mothership to do doling out smack and schemes, misplaced trust and secret reveals. But the revelations this week were worth sticking it out for. Maybe a sign the final episodes will ramp up the quality?

Oh, and guess who's still alive. *sad face*

The Global Fifth Column. Alien invaders are doomed.

Spoilers Now!

Anna greets Tyler after a week aboard, expressing her sympathy for his loss (like she's been too busy until now, but I think she just hates being around him). He's in one of the examination chambers, and Thomas advises he needs to take a final physical examination (hair cut) before deep space flight training. 

Anna is quite happy with the way things are going—destruction of the Fifth Column, Concordia underway, and soon, with Tyler aboard, the next phase of the interbreeding process. As Anna exposits, the examination will ensure his DNA is ready. 

Jack moves in with Hobbes at the headquarters. It's kind of like the Odd and Tedious Couple. Erica shows up and we get another round of "Sorry about what happened". She hasn't talked to Tyler since Joe's funeral.

But enough of that sappy business. Erica's brought Fierro in on their branch of the Fifth Column. She's hell bent on starting a war with Anna, but first she has to solidify her own power base, as Eli's lieutenants are gathering in Bangkok to talk about the new status quo, and she needs to be there.

Joshua advises Anna that there's a bit of a hiccup with Tyler—his phosphorous levels are not where they should be, and his body seems to be rejecting it. He isn't sure adding extra phosphorous will work, so Anna needs to make some backup plans. And there is a plan...there are alternates, and she chooses a guy from Spain named Raphael, which means Lisa is going to meet (breed) with him and check him out. Anna orders a phosphorous injection for Tyler, and if his levels remain low, he will be no use to them anymore, anway—please be low, please be low! Oh, and Tyler's haircut is a fail!

In Bangkok Erica meets with group of Fifth Column leaders. She starts laying down the law about injuring innocent civilians and all that suicide bombing nonsense, and instead bring the war to Anna. She has contacts on the mothership, which is access they don't have. So there. This seems to lessen their doubts, as long as she presents a plan, otherwise they'll pass leadership on to someone else.

Anna advises Lisa that Tyler is leaving on his first overnight training trip. In the meantime, her new assignment is to meet Raphael and entertain him. Lisa treads dangerously close to questioning her mother and betraying some emotion, considering she's (cough) in love with Tyler, but Anna orders her to do as she's told.

Erica Skypes with the gang, including Sydney (and hopefully the Visitors are not monitoring any signals worldwide with the keywords breeding, Visitor plan, Anna, etc.). They need to know what Anna wants (and since no one ever asked Ryan for his input, and since he's dead now...okay, maybe not). Chad has something to contribute—Anna is stopping the live aboard program, meaning she has what she needs. Erica reveals to Chad that Lisa is on there side, and he needs to go and ask her if she can find out anything.

Next, Sydney says he's reached out to the global scientific community and learned of other boys who have missing DNA segments like Tyler (??), so she advises him to try to locate where those boys are.

Fierro has learned that eighteen years ago, a Doctor Rai treated several pregnant women around the world, and Erica's like, "OMG, that's my OB-GYN!". Many of the babies died from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, but several survived. Dr. Rai just happens to be living in Hong Kong which is just a convenient hop, skip and a jump away, so they take off there to see what she has to say.

Anna asks Joshua for discretion as she includes him in a new scheme. She's thinking Lisa is experiencing human emotions. She wants him to lie and tell her his memory has returned and that he knows what it's like to have emotion. Report back to her what Lisa says.

Lisa goes to visit her grandmother again. Lisa confides about Anna's plan for Tyler and now her new Latin beau. Anna is changing her plans, Diana muses. Diana tells her to embrace the emotion...it can give them power. But Anna must never know of her feelings for Tyler. She must convince her mother she's loyal and obedient for now.

As is so much the case, Chad runs into Lisa on the mothership and wants an interview about being the first daughter. Pulling her aside, he tells her Erica sent him and they're working together. He wants to know why the live aboards have been tortured.

So she sneaks into some security room to review the files on the live aboards and Joshua happens by that room in the corridor (because the mothership is obviously as big as a small bungalow) and spies on her. He tells her he remembers being Fifth Column now, and feeling all those cuh-razy human emotions. He wants to talk about them. Obviously he remembers wrong, Lisa replies. Joshua apologizes, then calls her queen and leaves.

In Hong Kong, the gang meets with one of Cohn's men who tracked down Dr. Rai. She's living under an assumed name. Fierro can apparently get them into her secure apartment as hacking is one of his specialities, and so he gets them fifteen minutes off the building security cameras.

Hobbes can speak Chinese, so that's handy. He gets into the apartment and Erica terrorizes Dr. Rai for a moment before she admits to being the one they're looking for. Then Erica cuts her behind her ear and sees she's a Visitor. With promises of skinning, Rai gives up where her safe is. Unfortunately, before she can reveal the combination, she makes a break and jumps off the balcony, taking a suicide pill before hitting the ground.

Hobbes is liking the new Erica. They find a handy drill and flashlight and get to work on the safe. While they're working in close quarters to break in, they have a moment. Hobbes opens the safe. They grab a holo device and a bunch of passports, and run like hell, with two minutes left on the clock. 

Back in New York, Ryan finds Jack on the street. He has a scratch on his face from the big explosion. He defends his actions, trying to save his baby, blah blah blah. He needs help to get the damn baby away from Anna. Everybody needs a second chance. Sigh. Jack says it's not his job to absolve him, and walks away.

Back at Hong Kong headquarters, they see that Rai visited the same cities over and over again for 19 years. The holo device shows 29 boys in 29 cities, each with a mothership over them. The ships are there because of the boys, and there's a picture of Tyler, as well as others on the data, which means Tyler is expendable. Hobbes assures her they'll keep him safe.

Rai also has some prenatal vitamins—the same ones which Erica took when she was pregnant. Hobbes cracks one open and some crazy tiny bug thingies spread out all over the table. Not good.

Everybody converges for the big infodump of overdue revelations—Hobbes and crew return, and update what they found in China. Lisa phones Chad and sends him information that will explain everything about the live aboards and he heads to the hideout to report in.

Here we go...Anna chose the live aboards who are genetically exceptional to steal the best DNA of the human race, which explains (according to Sydney) why the Visitor skeleton's DNA and Malik's DNA are quite far apart...there's thousands of years of evolution between the two samples. The Visitors are using human DNA to fast track their own evolution. Sydney's analyzed the robot bugs, which were programmed to go after anything with the Y chromosome (those robot bugs are damn big to be crawling through cells and stealing DNA, and must hurt like HELL!). 

Joshua reports to Anna that he saw Lisa looking through medical files but he doesn't know which ones. Lisa meets Raphael and gets to first base right away. But then she gets all hot and cold (like Katy Perry's Hot N' Cold) and pushes him away. He has to go. Raphael appears confused.

Anna is not impressed and has a little chat with her rebellious daughter. Lisa demands to be told what her plan is for her. Anna goads her, then gives her a smack. Lisa punches her back, then apologizes. Anna tells her not to be sorry. It's just her breeding skin fueling the aggression, but she's not queen yet, she adds with a little rough chin squeeze. And she'll do as she tells her. 

Later, confiding in Joshua, Anna believes the problem with Lisa will be more serious, but they can't proceed without her. But she has a Plan C, and tells him she needs to show him something...there's a queen egg in stasis that she had preserved from her last batch. If Lisa fails, it's her alternate.

Anna wants him to hatch it, but their experiments on growth acceleration have proven a failure so far (what what what? Last season's surviving soldier eggs grew up pretty damn fast!). And all of Anna's other eggs are grown to adulthood (so that's why we don't see any Visitor babies running around). But, there's that yackity hybrid baby that's lizardy enough she might be useful to experiment on, Joshua thinks aloud. Great idea for Anna (and us). She orders him to start experiments.

Erica consults with the global fifth column, filling them in that the Visitors have been foraging for the best DNA across the universe to advance their species, and now they're doing it on Earth. See how smart I am, she says, and they're willing to follow her as leader. Anna is about to welcome the final live aboards. Once she gets their impressive DNA, she'll have what she needs to proceed with their plan.

Tyler is back and has proven to be a capable pilot. Joshua has initiated the experimentation on the hybrid which survived the first aging experiment (which must have taken all of twenty minutes given it's only five minutes later), but her body has healed itself of its chronic pain as a side effect. Ryan just happens to be there (?) and asks to see his daughter...AGAIN, so Anna is happy to oblige, and when he sees a kid that's a few years older (and much quieter) she says "Mommy!" and runs to Anna.

Welcome back, Ryan, she says. Oh, and thanks for neutralizing the Fifth Column. As a reward, he can spend a few hours with his new pre-adolescent daughter. Anna remains pleased. But Ryan needs to be eliminated, as his cover with the Fifth Column is no longer viable.

Lisa sees Tyler upon his return, telling him she missed him, but he's more interested in flying shuttles now than icky girls. She tells him not to hold in his emotions. It's okay to be sad (about his dad dying and all). But Tyler doesn't want to feel anything anymore. He just want to be a shuttle pilot, and walks away.

Lisa returns to Diana, admitting she was right. She wants to be with Tyler. Diana recognizes the good in human emotion. She advises Lisa to trust no one, then gives her a grandmotherly hug, because her mother never did. Lisa gives her a communication device so they can keep in touch, and leaves. Diana smiles. *sniffle*

WTF?!

Anna's suddenly so trusting, and then she's not. Joshua is a traitor who just happens to have amnesia that's making him loyal, yet she comments how she trusts him implicitly with all the key elements of the invasion. Is he lying? He seems eager to turn in Lisa until he gives her that last "My queen," bit. Was that a signal, or am I reading too much into the dialogue?

Most important this week—no more damn baby. It looks like they're taking the starchild route of the original series, so we could be in for another growth spurt. But what's all this talk about the problems of growth acceleration? Anna had her surviving eggs grown to adulthood real quick last season before she killed them to prove she didn't have emotion.

Obviously the big reveal of the master plan is the main event this week. Birth Pangs could be a metaphor for the entire series, but the plan actually made a lot of sense given all the stuff the Visitors are doing. Whoever is the lucky boy to breed with the queen, Tyler must have been the best of the 29 to have his city chosen for Anna's mothership.

I must have grown dead inside to brush off all the dubious pseudo-science and gobbledygook about how everyone arrived at their answers—global scientific network, vast DNA databases, etc. This was the most information we got on the Visitors in the entire series, so a lot to take in, but it had me interested when Anna, Joshua and the Fifth Column were tossing theories and facts back and forth. Which meant for less heavy sighs and eye-rolling at the dialogue. Even Diana was surprisingly subdued without her daughter to play off of.

Review: V "Siege"

Non Spoiler Review:

Siege plays out like a series game-changer, with Anna gleefully (whoops, that would be emotion) cornering Eli Cohn and the Fifth Column thanks to awful Ryan's treachery. A whole lot of people are put in jeopardy as scheme number two is set in motion to get Tyler to move aboard the mothership for good. Some die. Baby cries. There's talk of the human soul. And Jack gets kicked out of his rectory after being laicized by the Pope (which isn't near as interesting as it sounds).

Unfortunately, the events of this week would have been suitable for last season's finale, and rather than finding any excitement in the climax, it felt more like about time. Siege highlighted how wasted the series has been, taking a season and a half to do what was accomplished in the four hours of the 80s miniseries. There's so little emotionally invested in these characters right now, they could mow down half of them and spark no feeling from me (which means I'm a Visitor, I guess).

I'm finding some joy in the farcical behaviour of the FBI, personified by Paul and Chris, which brought a few humorous moments. Meanwhile, the Visitors have slipped so easily into cheesy super villainy, Anna might just as well put on a cape and stare out the window of the mothership all day scheming. Somehow I don't think the writers intend to be so self-satirizing, but it seems Diana is speaking for us when she comments to her daughter "Why do you keep doing this, coming down here to gloat, doing this dance we do..."

Spoilers Now!

One day later, the world is waiting for news on Marcus. Karen and Chad debate the issue, and she suggests actions like these are going to lead Anna to lose her cool and forget she's of peace. That's very insightful, given that Anna is on the mothership by Marcus' bedside, vowing (so vindictively, I might add, she might as well be Scarlett O'Hara swearing she'll never be hungry again) to hunt down the Fifth Column and make them PAY. Grrr...

Then she goes to Ryan who can't get the baby to stop crying. Just in case we've forgotten, Anna reminds everyone she'll need her Bliss. In exchange, she wants Eli Cohn this time and instructs Ryan to meet and kill him (perhaps it would be more efficient if she outlined all her requests at once, rather than one per episode). Ryan admits the Fifth Column must know he sold them out and won't let him get close. Anna suggests he'll find a way. It's so easy to be her.

Erica's been raked over the coals by the FBI for the shooting fiasco, and she's been taken off duty for the time being, which allows her more fun time with the family. But first she needs to give Cohn a head's up to keep a low profile. Hobbes is certain that Ryan sold them out. And apparently this conversation has already happened offscreen, as Erica tells him to bring Ryan in so she can at least look him in the eye first before they kill him. Wow. What difference one episode can make.

Jack receives an official papal decree that he's been laicized and must move out of the rectory within the week. Jack asks to give one last service, but Travis won't let him and demands his collar. It's just ordinary Jack now.

Ryan's back to his old days of tracking, which means jumping on cars and stuff, and kills one of Cohn's men (there goes the double agent theory). But he runs into an already armed Cohn and several men waiting for him in his building. They taser him and beat him up a bit.

Erica's enjoying happy time with Joe and Tyler when she gets the call from Cohn that Ryan tried to kill him and is in his custody. Erica wants to talk to him first. Cohn agrees, but Ryan is going to die, regardless. Outside Cohn's building, an additional tracker has followed Ryan to Cohn's base and advises Anna of the Fifth Column's location. She has an even better idea—call the FBI anonymously to report the location of the Fifth Column, and the Visitors' hands will be clean. Like clockwork, A.D. Paul gets the tip and he and Chris head down to the site.

Given Erica is a prime suspect, they avoid calling her to tip them off, but Erica's already arrived to see about the Ryan situation. Beaten and tied up, Ryan gives his sob story about his sick baby, and he came for Eli not Erica. He warns her to leave or she'll be dead like the rest of them.

Cohn's men alert them that the FBI is on the way and are surrounding the building. Eli has the area under surveillance and Erica is adamant she won't get in a firefight with her colleagues. She knows what to do to avoid a bloodbath and get them all out of there. She apparently has figured out the FBI is on to her already, so she'll pose as a hostage (Oh, my god. No one's ever done that!). That would clear her and buy them all time, Cohn muses. He has to punch her a few times in the face, though, to make it convincing.

Outside, ever diligent Chad has already arrived to report on the situation, just as Erica is brought out onto the balcony as a hostage so she can wave her cell phone and look all battered for an astonished Paul and Chris. On V cam, Anna is surprised to see Erica there, too, but that gives her an even better idea to work the situation—get rid of Erica and Joe, and Tyler's emotional ties will be severed. Thomas will handle it, and Anna instructs Lisa her job will be to get Tyler to cooperate and on board the ship for the next phase of the invasion. 

Tyler and Joe's football game is interrupted by a call from Lisa advising him about his mother. As planned, Joe heads down there to find out what's going on, saying he'll call Tyler as soon as he knows anything. Meanwhile, defrocked Jack is leaving the rectory when he sees the news about Erica, and he takes off there, too. 

Paul apparently trusts Erica now as they speak on the phone. She says Cohn has an idea to get them all out without anyone getting hurt, but everyone has to keep calm (I think I somehow missed where she explained what she was doing there in the first place. I think). Meanwhile, Thomas gives Paul a V device to see inside the building, allowing them to pick out all the Fifth Column snipers—Hey, that would really have come in handy last week for the Concordia gala...seeing through buildings and finding snipers and stuff.

Joe arrives and pushes his way through the police barriers to get an update from the FBI. An agent, a friend of Erica's, tells him they found a hidden entrance into the building that the Fifth Column doesn't know about. Once they have the go ahead, they'll do everything they can to get her back safely. The agent is abruptly called away and leaves that very set of blueprints (complete with marked out passage) with Joe (!).

Erica and Cohn share a brief and heartfelt conversation about family and how important it is (given they have so much time on their hands at the moment). Then who should be brought in, but Joe! They found him in a bricked up tunnel in the basement. But Erica's never heard of the agent who gave him the map. Was it a sleeper V? Erica puts it all together, and figures the V's want both her and Joe killed.

Anna is advised everything is proceeding as planned, though the FBI has called off its attack on the building. Anna says Marcus has another asset on the ground—Hobbes—who will take care of everything if the FBI doesn't move in. She sends Thomas down to handle it (how that must suck for the chief engineer to have to do all Marcus' errands too).

Cohn watches the FBI lock in on targets that they can't possibly see (using Anna's tech). But he has another ace up his sleeve and makes a call. Random people in the crowd get the signal and pull off their jackets. It's a flash mob—but with suicide vests. Paul calls off the attack on the building as these new men take hostages and head inside.

Erica is infuriated and decides it's time for a moral debate about involving civilians. Hostages are the only way to ensure they all live right now, Eli says. Cohn is willing to die if he has to, but Erica and Joe must escape with his own second-in-command who knows all of Cohn's worldwide contacts (let's call him Fierro, as I think that's what they called him). Oh, and he's drafting Erica as leader of the Fifth Column because he's seen in her that she recognizes this is a fight for their families. He tells her to live to fight Anna another day and take his people out there with her. 

Jack shows up at the police barricade, but they won't let him in and Chris decides to come over to yell at him for putting Erica in jeopardy. So he calls Hobbes, who won't show up either given his high visibility. But Hobbes is intercepted by Thomas, who has a job for him. Apparently they have his girlfriend Sarah (who was supposed to have died five years ago). Thomas has her voice recorded, and orders him to detonate a bomb in the crowd, or he'll never see Sarah alive. That seems to be sufficient to convince Hobbes to betray his friends.

Remember Ryan? Erica comes to say good-bye. She says she'll do everything she can to help the baby, but she'll never forgive him. He apologizes, but it's too late for that, she says. Erica then says good-bye to Cohn. Fierro will blend in with the hostages as they walk out. Finally, she gets to Joe, and he says they have so much time to make up for, and kiss. Aw. That can't be good.

Chris then gets the call from Erica that Cohn wants to release the hostages and he'll surrender himself. He assures her no one will fire as long as Cohn's men don't. 

Erica slowly leads everyone out, but Hobbes is on site and removes the explosive device, ready to set it in the crowd. Cohn, meanwhile, arms all the suicide vests and blows himself and the building up first. With absolute mayhem, the FBI moves in, creating a firefight with the snipers who are apparently still on the roof (or some roof. Somewhere). Erica tries to get Joe and the hostages to safety but he's shot in the leg. Chris drags Erica away, and Joe is gunned down in a hail of bullets. She pulls free and goes to him (this scene needed some slow motion). Hobbes puts the device back in his pocket, considering they don't need any more stuff blown up, and slips away. Anna watches it all with a smile (Ack! More emotion). 

In the aftermath, Fierro has managed to walk away in the commotion. Tyler runs over, as he got tired of waiting for his dad to call, and since apparently no one has a medic for Joe, the three of them just huddle in the rubble. Chris watches sadly and comments that they were wrong about Erica. She's clean. (So...I guess they'll just forget all the surveillance footage of her and Jack). There's no doubt that she's off the hook as Paul literally announces he will kill the paperwork on Erica Evans.

Anna gloats to Diana that the Fifth Column is destroyed and soon the human soul. "Why the need to prove herself to her?" Diana asks. Anna says her attempts to fuel human emotions in her will not work. Diana counters that she thought it was working so well. "You'll have to try harder," she says. "Oh...I will," Diana sneers. 

Anna emerges from her space elevator thing, which just happens to be in the middle of a corridor, and Lisa just happens to be strolling down that corridor in the kilometres-long mothership and sees her mother walk away. Lisa decides to see what that's all about and descends into the pit and looks around.

"I'm your grandmother!" Diana says. But she can't tell anyone yet. "How do I know I can trust you?" Lisa asks. "We share the same enemy. Your mother," Diana declares.

Tyler decides to leave for the mothership now that dad's dead. Erica needs him, but he says people killed his father, so he's going to the V's. If Erica had stopped the Fifth Column maybe Joe would be alive. So there. Erica slaps him (Yay!). He leaves. Not her best day.

Jack, Chad and Hobbes hang out at the headquarters as Erica shows up. Joe's dead. Tyler left. Eli left her in charge, so her first act is to declare they go on the offensive. They strike first from now on. They're all in. She tells Hobbes she should have listened to him about Ryan. She's kept him caged, but not anymore. He says she's got him (until Sarah gets trotted out again). They have an army now. Very inspiring. This should have happened last season.

WTF?!

It's a crime that an actress like Elizabeth Mitchell, who delivered such emotional performances in Lost, has to struggle through these horribly written and contrived scenes. But at least she gets to cry twice.

Speaking of contrived, Hobbes is working for the Visitors...or not...I don't really know, given we hadn't heard about this since Marcus met with him. Apparently through the miracle of Visitor technology (plot devices) they've dug up his missing girlfriend after five years and that's enough to soften Hobbes' heart (when we all know he's super crushing on Erica).

The scariest notion is that Ryan has survived the explosion. The lack of a final scene with him, much less a body, promises that Anna will get to hold that screaming baby over him again someday. And maybe the FBI should have put their police cordon a few blocks away from the building and the snipers, just so that all the spectators didn't get showered with bullets and debris when it all went to hell?

The only gem this week was Anna's chat with her mother, which is starting to become more and more like alien Dynasty with the snappy barbs and Jane Badler's virulent sneer (never mind the evening gowns). It's all great fun, and now that Lisa's stumbled upon her, it's sure to get campier. 

Review: V "Concordia"

Non Spoiler Review:

Such promise...for about ten minutes. Some more of Anna's master plan is revealed, and her vendetta against the human soul has blessedly little screen time. The Fifth Column has a chance to strike back hard against the Visitors, if they can only get their act together. And Tyler's eighteen, free to make all the bad decisions he wants.

Concordia was building up to a promising finish, but the writers again dropped the ball and we get an erratic series of short scenes that just deflate a lot of the tension. The actors aren't even trying anymore and chug through their exposition-heavy lines. What could have been multiple exciting revelations come across as big yawns.

We've reached new depths of incompetence with the resistance. The Visitors really deserve to win if this is the best they've got. Ryan's behaviour is outrageous and Anna hauls out the screaming baby a few more times this week. Apparently Erica just wants to be in Fifth Column Lite for now, unless, of course, it directly impacts her family. Chad gets a new co-anchor, but their screen test is laughable and they would be hard pressed to find work on a local access channel. Big fail.

Hobbes and Cohn need to stage a coup next week and vote Erica and Jack out of the Fifth Column. And while they're at it, skin Ryan. And toss that damn crying baby out of the mothership. That will be Bliss.

"Please, help me welcome my new co-anchor and unnecessary character, Karen."

Spoilers Now!

Anna gives Chad an exclusive of the Visitors' latest gift to humanity, Concordia—a name that refers to cooperation between their two species. The holographic representation shows ginormous city-like structures that will be constructed in vacant urban areas worldwide, a space for learning, healing, etc, and employing countless thousands in its construction. A giant urban renewal project, Chad muses. Indeed, and the announcement will be made at a gala the following evening.

As Erica watches the interview, she reviews the video of the church vandalism again. Tyler comes in, and it's his big eighteenth birthday. She doesn't say anything about what she knows of his activities, but tries to make him feel like he can trust her. When he leaves for peace ambassador duty, she calls his father and tells him they need to talk.

Anna consults with her chief engineer Thomas to ensure Concordia proceeds on schedule. Once the landing sights for their ships are ready, the invasion can proceed, he says. Marcus worries the Fifth Column will attack the gala, but Anna has put her faith in Ryan that he will help them with that.

Ryan meets up with Cohn, and surprisingly confides in him that Anna has his daughter. He wants to work together with him so they can strike hard against her. The problem is Erica, who is ideologically opposed to his methods, but Ryan suggests he can be the bridge between them. They agree that the gala is the perfect opportunity to take Anna down for good.

Yay, we're back together until I'm killed next week.

Erica's busy—as head of the Fifth Column Task Force, Assistant Director Paul gives her and Chris lists of names to clear for Anna's gala. They're also attempting to get a warrant for Father Jack.

As they go over the plans, Tyler's father, Joe shows up (he must have teleported to NYC). She takes him into her office to show him a USB of everything about the Visitors and Tyler's DNA (she's made up a little presentation). That's a lot to take in, but Joe does a pretty good job, much like everyone who learns the truth about the invasion. He's also brought up to speed on Tyler's missing DNA segments. They don't really talk about the questionable paternity, but I guess we're assuming they do that off screen.

Erica has a plan, as she's just as much a manipulative mother as Anna.  Tyler wants his family back together, which is something Anna can't give him, so she asks Joe to come back.

Anna is excited it's Tyler's birthday, too (as excited as she can get without a soul). Now he's eighteen he can make his own choices and not be bound by his family. She can give him something humanity cannot—a future. Lisa has a present for Tyler, as well. She gives him a Visitor video thingie of them kissing. She probably spent $5 on it, and it's totally not as awesome as her mother's.

Joe and Erica walk up, creating an awkward moment (likely because Joe is considering his son is sleeping with a lizard). Joe's solution is to give his son a map of a route he took when he turned eighteen and the restored Harley to drive him there. Erica gives her blessing for him to use the couple of months before college and take some time to think about his future. Make the trip and they'll be here for him when he gets back. Joe wants another chance. On the V jacket cam, Marcus and Anna watch. No big deal, Anna muses. He has yet to see her gift.

The Fifth Column meets, and Ryan announces Cohn wants their help to assassinate Anna by bombing the gala. That doesn't go over well at all with Erica and Jack. Which is why he needs their help, Ryan says. With Erica's inside access, they can kill Anna with little collateral damage. Ryan and Hobbes are both on side. If Anna dies, Lisa would be queen, he would get his daughter back and Tyler would be safe. It's all win-win. Ryan's going to take the chance regardless of their decision, and so Jack sides with Erica when she refuses to agree to it and risk civilians. She warns Ryan not to put her in a position to make a choice, because she'll take him down if she has to.

Joe calls Erica to join him on the mothership as Tyler got a call from Anna about his birthday gift. They all come up to see them as a family where Anna introduces Tyler to engineer Thomas and offers him the opportunity to be the first human to pilot one of their shuttles (yawn). He will live on board and Thomas will oversee his training. Tyler thinks that's awesome. Erica thanks Anna for the generous gift. After her mother leaves, Lisa confides in them that she isn't sure what it all means (I know how you feel, Lisa), but plans for Tyler must be accelerating.

In this week's side plot, Chad gets a talking to by his network superiors, who want to change the program format from a pro-visitor stance to a more critical outlook, given all the doubts about Anna recently in world opinion. Kind of a point-counterpoint thing. Chad's all for it. So he begins testing with co-anchors. He and new gal Karen debate the merits of Concordia and Visitor intentions with the most tedious back and forth exchange imaginable. She aces the screen test with her illuminating colonial analogies and gets offered the job.

Marcus comes to brief Erica at the FBI with her team. Anna thanks them all for providing security at the event. Security is going to be really tight. But...Erica has had a change of heart all of a sudden now that Tyler's life is in jeopardy so she's now okay with assassinating Anna in a room full of people.

What ensues is an attempt to convey an elaborate byzantine caper as we go back and forth between the FBI briefing and her own walk through with the Fifth Column. Jack is going to be the decoy, drawing personnel to his location when he comes to protest the gala, allowing Hobbes and crew to get in with Erica's help. Cohn will have his men there as protesters ensuring the cops are busy. Erica hands out disposable cell phones. Everything will go through her. For tonight, at least, they work together.

Anna and Thomas review their Concordia plans, and the big reveal is this—the structure of Concordia will be completed as the Red Rain takes effect in the population. The structures will allow the cloaked breeding ships to land on top, and Visitor soldiers will begin rounding up women for breeding. The second phase of the invasion will begin, and it will be too late for humanity. Gasp!

Erica is dolled up for the gala, and says good-bye to Joe. She suggests Joe crash on the couch rather than drive back home. He says okay. Subtle, but this is the extent of romance on the show.

Anna is looking quite smashing, as well. She meets Ryan with his daughter before she departs the mother ship. Anna wants to know if there are any threats from the Fifth Column (nice of her to ask at this late juncture). Ryan tells her he's not aware of anything. She seems to accept him at his word so she says he needs to infiltrate deeper. The baby makes a ruckus—the disease Anna's given her is getting worse and only her Bliss will alleviate it. So she doles out some more Bliss. 

At the gala site, guests begin to arrive. Everybody we love is there, including Chad, and suddenly Karen (who has managed to swing an invite). She wants an introduction to Anna, so when she has her big chance, Karen asks her what's the purpose behind all their generosity (she must have been saving up this question for a long time as I'm sure Anna's never been asked it before). Anna tells her they've only given things that were needed to humanity, and they're of peace always. Karen's, like, oh okay. Just checking.

Outside, Jack is with some anti-V agitators. On Erica's signal, he leads his protesters to the gate. She sends Chris to shut it down. Hobbes and Cohn are signalled to move in. Erica lets them in through a back door. Hobbes and Cohn set up their rifle at a nice sniper-friendly area with clear view of the podium. That's the plan!  

Ryan watches the broadcast from home, given he was too recognizable to participate in the operation. He checks a photo of his baby on his phone. What is this we see...love? Uh oh.

As Anna makes her way to the stage, Marcus suddenly steps up and warns her Ryan (!) has reported in that the Fifth Column is planning to assassinate her. She refuses to cancel the announcement, so ever-loyal Marcus says he'll take her place instead. When it appears that they've been tipped off, Cohn decides on his own to take a shot at Marcus to at least take out their second-in-command. Erica's not sure about that, and even less so when Marcus introduces Tyler as the first human to pilot a V shuttle and brings him up out of the crowd.

Cohn assures her Hobbes can make the shot, and he's like I'm gonna do it! Erica runs up on stage to giver her son a big hug and embarrass the hell out of him, but also get him out of the line of sight, and Marcus takes a hit. 

Mayhem ensues and Anna is rushed out of the crowd. Erica leads Tyler out and they pause to watch Anna board the shuttle, who sends Erica one of her mighty suspicious glares.

On the mothership, Joshua advises that Marcus' injuries are critical and there's a good chance he'll die (Here's an idea, Joshua—how about using the same medical technology that pretty much resurrected you from the dead!). She places Thomas as her second-in-command. Add to her vexing evening, Tyler has opted out of the shuttle program. But Anna says he is not their only choice. There are others...

Tyler tells his dad he doesn't want to lose his family. After a long evening of assassination attempts, Erica's baked a cake and they enjoy a happy family birthday party. Paul is thoroughly pissed with Chris and Erica, but Chris tells him he gave Erica a lot of rope that day and she took it. His surveillance shows she met with Jack earlier. The protest was a planned distraction, so he let Jack go in favor of catching the bigger fish...he asks to start a special investigation into Erica.

Jack's actions have violated Vatican policy, so Father Travis has the duty to remove him from the parish. Ryan is back on the mothership with his screaming baby. Anna's peeved that he was not entirely truthful, but he tells her he'll give her whoever she wants if she just Blisses his daughter...my queen!

Hobbes and Cohn stew about their haywire plan and wonder who tipped Anna off. There's really two options—Erica and Ryan, and Hobbes knows it wasn't Erica. So guess who gets skinned next week? 

Why can't I be an FBI agent, part-time resistance leader and mother?

WTF?!

This week had great potential, but yet again slid off the rails at the climax. It's a sad state of affairs when the only sympathetic characters are aliens and terrorists (re: Hobbes, Cohn and Lisa). Everyone else is incredibly stupid. 

Concordia was actually a good premise and brought a lot of lingering plot elements to the forefront—the massive fleet that's been sitting on the backburner, Tyler's value to Anna, and Erica and Joe's relationship. Though the storylines were rushed and we get the usual short, plot driven scenes of exposition, at least these elements were somewhat interesting. Something tells me Joe is not going to last very long here.

The entire gala was such a contrived mess it had me longing for the original series. Back in the day, the old V had a gala too, where Visitor commander John and Diana were announcing a cure for cancer—only the resistance succeeded in crashing that party and ripped John's face off on live television, revealing the lizard underneath. It was awesome! And that was in the 80s! Why can't this show pull off stuff half as good as that?

Anna apparently has total control already, if she can simply announce the construction of what amounts to new cities within the world's major urban areas with a couple of weeks of negotiations that must have included national, state and municipal governments. All of this after she created that public relations disaster, Red Rain. How long are these things going to take? From the diagram it looks like they reach at least a mile into the sky, if not more, and they're building these mini-cities everywhere? (I guess we'll just wait until season ten of V).

Ryan's crisis of conscience has been played so ridiculously, I'm ambivalent if he remains loyal or turns on the Fifth Column. The writers could be pulling out some double agent twist where he's actually going to get to Anna, but I just don't care at this point. He's in the Fifth Column, then he's not, then he's in again, then he's saving Anna's life and calling her queen. Because his baby has a disease that Anna must alleviate through continued Bliss? It's going to be bittersweet for him when he finds out Anna's been playing him all this time and he just has a a colicky baby!